Fatherhood

Fatherhood...what can I say? A terrifying experience; a scary change; a shocking new addition; a far cry from what I expected. I shall respond by saying check, check, check and check. At least thats what I felt just before my son was born and a smidgeon of time after he was born. Now I say a wonderful experience; a blessed change; an extraordinary new addition; but yes still a far cry from what I expected.


I will tell you why "a far cry from what I expected." Before the birth of Tyler I had so many ideas about how our new life would go. My wife and I would galliantly whisk him in the house on the first day with utmost confidence protruding from our skin. We would whisper ever so gently to him when he started crying and he would stop right away. We would put him in his crib by himself from day one and he would sleep the whole night through. When he gets hungry my wife would immediately satisfy him by offering her milk-filled boobies and it would be as easy as making a PB&J. Hey, I read the Complete Idiot's Guide to Fatherhood so it can't be that bad...(queue the vinyl record screeching)...can it?


All my dreams of being the perfect parents and having the perfect baby have been thrown out the window. His drawers that were full of perfectly folded, color coded onsies now look like a hurricane visited. My spotless clean house now looks like the Bumpess' dogs from the Christmas Story rampaged through the front door and out the back. Is that a bad thing? Absolutely not! Now that I see how our lives are changing, I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm glad that I don't have all the answers. Hooray for not knowing right off the bat how to stop my child from crying. Kudos to me for him not sleeping in his crib like I thought he would the first night. The only comment I will make about my wife feeding baby from the boobies is...you are my hero honey!

My point is this...if we could of been the perfect parents and whisked him in like I was describing in paragraphs before, it would be boring! For one, we would not be bonding with Tyler like we are now. Secondly, my wife and I would not be growing closer in our mutual attempt to do what God has asked us to do. Honestly I didn't think my wife and I could get any closer. I mean we can finish each others sentences and now even closer, thanks Lord!

Before I go please hear me out. All my life I've always heard people say "its all about the baby now". Huh? If you make it all about the baby, your marriage will dissolve! I've seen this happen to marriages. Instead, it should be "its all about the family now". Men, not only do you have the responsibility of helping your loved one with taking care of the baby and doing it with a smile, but you still have the responsibility of taking care of her, and you better do that with a smile also! Make sure your wife always knows how beautiful she is and how needed she is.

To my wife, you are so special to me. You are more beautiful than words can describe. I need you more now than I ever have before, but I have no worries because in thine eyes...you are super mom! I love you baby!

Now men...that's how you do it!

37 Weeks

Yesterday means 3 weeks left until we meet our son. This of course is unless God decides to send him early. I've had so many people ask me, "are you ready?" My response has been "as ready as I can be." Maybe my response should have been "are you kidding me, what kind of question is that!" How could I be ready? I mean I've never been a father before. How do I know how to take care of a baby?

I think that these sort of questions linger because of fear, obviously right? I'm not so sure this is the only reason. Can't these questions linger because of excitement? Absolutely! I am excited. Excited because of the unknown. Excited because here comes something in my life and my wife's life that has our blood running through his body. Here comes a God-given human being that will have features of myself and my wife. Isn't that cool? That's exciting because I'm good looking and my wife is better looking. We will have a good looking boy and we can't wait to meet him!

Other questions linger, such as, how do I raise a boy to be a good, generous, loving, sweet, honest, hard-working and respectful Christian? I can read books for information. I've already read books seeking guidance in regards to this matter. A problem with this is that I've forgotten what I read. It all sounded good when I read it, but now a few weeks later, what did that book say about teaching your boy to respect others who respect you? What did it say about teaching him to be a giver and not a taker? Pray is what I say! And have confidence. I will constantly pray for wisdom and guidance. We will be good parents!

Just a nice poem...

My Son

As I feel you in Mom's belly, I wonder...
I wonder what you look like as God creates you in His likeness.
Will you have my lips?
Will you have Mom's nose?
Will you have my cheeks or her toes?

As I feel you kick, I dream...
I dream about the good times we will soon share.
Will you like football or golf?
Will you like playing in the yard?
Will you like to sing or strum a guitar?

As I watch you come into this world, I will ask Him...
I will ask Him for guidance and wisdom.
Will He answer?
Will He listen?
Will He help us as Christians?

The most important thing I will teach you...
Yes God will answer.
Yes God will listen.
Yes He will help us as Christians.

You are unique.
You are loved.
You are a blessing.
See you soon my son as I will teach you these lessons.

"Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you. Before you were born, I set you apart." Jeremiah 1:5

Please allow myself to...introduce myself

Why blog is what I have continued to ask myself over the last couple of weeks since I began creating my profile. I'm no writer! But I feel as though at times I have something to say. So I've decided that this Saturday morning is the day I will attempt to write because hey...I've got nothing to lose. I've always heard that writing a journal is great therapy, so here I go. Welcome to my journal...

If you read my profile you will get a sense of who I am. I believe what I wrote is somewhat true, but, at the same time, I'm just being funny because that's what I like to do. I can be extemely goofy and my wife loves it...at least that's what she tells me.

Ok, so to move forward with a little about myself. I've had a good life! The only parts that have not been good is because I screwed up! Some say you have to screw up to learn. I believe that to a certain extent, but sometimes I wish I could go back in time to change some of those screw ups. At times you do wonder, what went wrong? Was it the fact that my parents divorced when I was a mere 1, resulting in me having to take the Greyhound bus back and forth from central Alabama to south Alabama. Was it that both of my parents got remarried and it was strange to me because I didn't really understand. Was it the fact that my father drank a lot. Maybe it was just the shear peer pressure I faced because I wanted to fit in and my mom let me roam. Maybe a combination of all things, but I don't blame anyone. My parents were and are great. They've always immensely cared about me and loved me. My dad quit drinking over 15 years ago and we are now great friends. He did it for my brother and I, but most importantly for himself. For that Dad I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I love you.

My life has changed so much since my younger years. Relationships have been the key to this change: my wife and Jesus. I believe that both saved my life from hell. My wife...kind, gentle, loving, caring, forgiving and beautiful! Jesus...the same! I thank God for my relationships with her in the flesh and Him in the flesh! Now baby Tyler on the way...my life will be complete. Baby Tyler will get his own blog in the near future so stay tuned. What a great story I have about him. Be real everyone.